‘Tiny’ Act of Selfishness

Today I watched in shock as cars got held up in traffic jam because of a ‘tiny’ act of selfishness. Someone wanted to park in an accessible place for dashing in and out of a supermarket. This should not have been a problem for anyone if all traffic continued flowing freely. That was not the outcome however. I watched in wonder as 3 different roads were lined up with cars because of this very ‘tiny’ act of selfishness.

As I watched this, I was left wondering. How many times have I done something for my convenience knowing it is wrong? How many times have I counted the cost before I do that ‘tiny’ act of selfishness? How many times have I thought of anyone but me as I go about my business?

So, the year is ending and time for making resolutions is once again here. I am starting to think that maybe I will make some resolutions that do not benefit only me but my neighbour too. I am starting to think that maybe I will think about something more than I need to make more money, lose more weight, make more friends or even become more famous. I think that maybe,this coming year I will write resolutions that deal with my ‘tiny’ acts of selfishness.

Maybe just maybe, a life will be changed by this resolution of mine.

2012, a year for me to kill these ‘tiny’ acts of selfishness
2012, a year for me to think past more for me to more for others



If you ever feel alone
And you want to give up
I am here
I may never seem to understand
I may never have the right words
I want to be your friend
I want to walk with you through the years
I want to be taught how to understand by trying to understand you

Don’t struggle alone
Coz I want to walk besides you
Don’t crawl up the steep mountain alone
Coz I want to crawl up with you
Don’t cry alone
Coz I want to be there…
To give you a shoulder to lean on
To give you a hug
And maybe cry with you

Let me be your friend
Let me be there at the sunrise
Let me be there at the sunset
Let me be there in the sunshine
Let me be there in the rain
Let me be able to do all I can do
You are my friend
My divine gift from God

Am made for more

A friend of mine once challenged me when she said, ‘ Imagine if we all felt and said this when getting married,” I am sure, with no doubt at all in my mind, body and soul that this is the person I want to spend my entire life with.” Not because my time is running out, not because I have no choice, not because I couldn’t do any better but because every part of me tells me so, my spirit is at peace.’

That has become my goal and desire in this fast and instant world of marriage.
I believe and desire that I would be able to say God wanted my marriage to My Man, He designed it, He is excited about it, it is the Union He always wanted and saw while I was being knit in my mother’s womb, am the missing rib of My Man, an arranged marriage by Him just like the first marriage. I want to make Him proud.
I want Him to be in heaven and tell all the angels,’ See my girl, she is doing exactly what I wanted her to do.’ I want to make Him proud because I was chosen and I accepted the right man from all the men He put around me. My desire to make Him proud supersedes my desire to get married. I really want what was written of Rachel and Jacob to be written of me and My Man, that we loved each other, that we inspired others, that we were obedient to Him. I desire that my relationship and relationships will be testimony of His love, peace, joy, faithfulness, loyalty.

I believe this with all my heart. It is never too late to do the right thing, it is never too late to make God proud, it is never too late to love your man right, it is never too late to forgive, it is never too late to bring all glory and honor to God through your relationship. it is never too late for you to be an example to all that see you, it is never too late to move in freedom of the past. Yes, it happened but we are moving on or at least God expects us to for He says He is doing a new thing.

My prayer is that as I go on with my everyday life, I will remember that my decision today affects the future generations. Whatever I do today will be remembered by someone; my kindness, unkindness, hate, selfishness, foolishness, love, care and all will be remembered by at least one person one this earth. Yah, people may understand my character or even personality but should it be at the expense of other people’s joy and happiness.

I desire to be a woman with a difference, a woman after God’s own heart. I am not made to live a status quo life, I am made to be a comforter, encourager, inspiration and mother of nations. Each person on earth is in God’s image and the last I checked my image looked like me.

My question would be; do people see Christ in me, what does the taxi guy think, what does the workmate think , how about my family?

I have finally decided I want a man after God’s own heart and with that I have decided to be that woman. I have been looking at God literary. What is God? What does He love to do? What breaks His heart? What makes Him smile?
I have decided that that is the measure of how much a man or woman after God’s own heart one is. I don’t believe it is measured in how much prayer I have in my life but in every single aspect of my life.

My question would be; am I reflecting God in my attitudes, words and actions?

I am tired. Tired of me shooting my fellow brothers and sisters with my words & actions, tired of me living in yesterday, tired of me excusing my bad behaviour with ‘that is me, I cant change’ &’I don’t feel like’, am tired of bad mouthing people and sending eye daggers to people. Am tired. Am made for more. More than me. The last time I looked, the world wasn’t rotating around me, so why do I think every single aspect of life has something to do with me, why do I think people have nothing else to do but talk about me, why do I think that everyone is out to destroy me, why?
Am tired!!!!

Am made for more and am going to live in that. Am made to be above the status quo and am going to work towards that…..so help me Lord.
I am a woman made to bring praise. How about you?